so much
I have so much to read and so little time... Books piling up for school and for my personal reading. I wish I could read faster.
I read a poem last night at Revolution Books, I really like being there. I love having a space downtown where I can escape the university environment I am beginning to hate. It's hard to imagine my goal of being in graduate school for several more years. I am very tired of the institution and the focus of it all, the goals of the university. I feel like it is turning most of the students into useless office workers that will be victim to the oppressive capitalist system. I want to escape it so badly, but each day it gets harder and harder to see beyond the dollar signs. A creative career is a terribly rare thing.
Sometimes I just want to shut myself up into my room and forget the rest of the world. Well, sometimes I do exactly that.
I promised I would spend next Tuesday night with someone who destroys me and drains me, so I am about to face a trying week. I am spending tonight with Ryu, looking forward to seeing him, but I have some things to do in the meantime. I am preparing myself, reading and getting ahead before Tuesday and the subsequent empty days it will cause.
Comments
"I want to escape it so badly, but each day it gets harder and harder to see beyond the dollar signs. A creative career is a terribly rare thing."
I could have written this. Like the child I am a lot of times I hang on to the hope of being able to live on something I love one day, but just as you said it's a difficult thing to ignore the main issue: Money. Money makes the world go round, as they say in Cabaret...and it really does. Meh..it's hard to ignore the pressure of the world sometimes. But I'm trying, and I think you should too. (Which I guess you can, since you seem to be a lot better at living in the moment than I am, but still...)