17 posts tagged “kabukicho”

Yesterday I finally landed in Tokyo around 7 am and took the slow local train back to WH's house. Arriving in Japan was such a relief... I can read the signs here! I can understand the language! I was so happy to be back in town. I mailed Arihito saying,  ただいま！　He and WH are the only people who I am talking to these days.

WH and I went to the pharmacy and bought some bandages, it felt nice to change them. I showered and shaved and cleaned my wounds because I was going to meet Ari in the evening and I needed to be presentable. He came and met me at the station, I was walking really slow and made him wait. We got in a taxi and went to Roppongi.

He told me that we were going to visit his friend's bar. It was across the street from Tokyo Midtown. Inside it was really cool and dark. Black everything and a big crow on the wall. The people there were all from the SM community in Tokyo and the owner was also the owner of several fetish clubs. This place, however, was just a normal bar. There were several attractive 30-something Japanese women there. Ari told me they were professional sadists. We had a couple drinks and then left to Shinjuku, Kabuki-cho.

We went to Silk, the happening bar I went to before. We hung out for a while, drinking, chain-smoking. After a while I changed into a costume, a short black frilly dress. He likes it when I do not wear a bra, so I took it off. We watched some people and messed around a little bit. We spent a couple hours idle... even though at that point I really wanted to have sex with him. A couple of American customers kept distracting him, and it was driving me crazy. Ari apologised to me, Sorry, I would have fucked you a long time ago if it wasn't for these guys. When I made it clear that nothing was going to happen between me and the Americans, they left. We entered one of the rooms.

He had previously suggested we go to a hotel, but we had sex there at the club. It was quite good and no one seemed to be watching us... We left soon after. We went to Golden Street in Shinjuku (second time I have been there, lots of tiny eclectic bars all cramped together, in 3-chome I think) and had some more drinks. I was kinda tired, having traveled from Thailand, to Viet Nam, then to Japan all in one day... but I was patient. We went to a nice love hotel around 6 am (nice is an understatement, it was especially nice and new, I like Shinjuku love hotels better than Shibuya, I think!). We showered and slept.

In the morning, we had sex again... then neither of us could sleep. We tried for a couple hours but then got up. On TV Mission Impossible dubbed in Japanese  entertained us while we got ready to leave. It was around 3 PM, nice and cool outside, bit cloudy, my favorite kind of weather. We went to have soba at this place in 2-chome, really delicious! I really like how he is. We don't need to talk, we are usually quite silent and do not say much. But I can tell he is thinking, it shows on his face. I like people who are always thinking and not necessarily talking.

Afterward, we walked around. He didn't seem to want to let me go. He invited me for a coffee, Do you want to have a coffee with me? Sure. We went to a cafe and I got a hot chocolate, he, iced coffee. A few cigarettes later, we finally parted ways. I think I will miss him! Planning to meet tomorrow, my last night in Tokyo...

Saturday was probably one of the most enjoyable days in my life. I don't want to use the word best, because I am sure I have had lots of other good nights and the word is quite vague, but it has been a while since I have taken a whole day out for myself and was able to pursue my own interests entirely.

I got home from the happening bar in Shibuya saturday morning around 06:00 (I walked home) and went to bed, tired and drunk. I got woken up by a phonecall from the travel agent in Shinjuku at 12:09 telling me that I could pick up my tickets to Hanoi. I needed to do that!

I got dressed for the Gazette live, nothing special like I did for the Buck-Tick concert, just sorta plain like I always dress. I didn't have time to visual-kei out, despite having lots of clothes here. I had to figure out which lines to take to get to the Saitama Super Arena... I had no idea where I was going. It was very hot and I walked all the way to Roppongi station under the burning sun (it is not really that far, it only feels far in dry hot weather). I took the Oedo line to Shinjuku, then I went quickly to Kabukicho to get my airplane tickets. Then it was back to the JR station.

At the station, I could see Gazette fans dressed up. It was clear! Cosplaying members of the band, etc. It was cool, and especially obvious on the train, we were all headed to the same place, 20,000 of us! The trains were full of visual kei fashion and dyed, ironed hair. It was awesome!

The arena was impressive, its size and design, and so many of the concert-goers outside were very cool looking, rivaling the artists themselves! I bought some merchandise (T-shirt and stickers) and got to my seat (it was not bad). I was getting so excited! The show started about 10 minutes after 17:00.

All in all, the concert was awesome. It was the tour final, so the crowd was loud and excited. The band seemed to be having a good time, and in turn everyone else did too. Japanese people are weird at concerts and all do the same movements at the same time with their arms. How do they know how to do that? I just prefer to watch and listen. The Gazette are pretty cool on stage. 

I don't want to compare them to Buck-Tick because they aren't really comparable in my mind, but I must say that the fact that I am obsessed with Sakurai Atsushi (Buck-Tick vocalist) made me a lot more excited to see their live in July. The Gazette's main appeal to me is their music, not so much a fan-girl for any of the members. But yeah, they really, really rock! They are truly the best visual kei band today. Wow, I was really impressed. I have seen some videos of their live performances, and I was not really expecting much. But they were amazing! There were fireworks and awesome visuals, so much sound, I loved the entire thing.

I had emailed the guy I mentioned in my last post, who is familiar with happening bars before the concert and he told me he was glad I had emailed him. He was trying to decide whether to go to Ageha (there was an SM exhibition that night) or to this other happening bar that he told me about. I told him to let me know if he wanted to meet and we could go together. After the Gazette ended, I took the train back to Shinjuku and met him at studio ALTA at about 22:25.

He decided to go to the happening bar. He described it as a nicer club compared to the Shibuya place we met at the night before. Naturally, it was in Kabuki-cho, completely underground. The sign on the door was simple, silver metal, with one word only, SILK. He spoke into a speaker and then we were allowed to enter. This club was very classy! They did not hassle me at all, and simply asked my name and his (he is a member). The first floor appeared as normal as can be, dark with low seats like hostess clubs. Customers spoke quietly and were relaxed. Everything appeared totally normal. He told me he would show me the downstairs later. We had a drink.

After a while I noticed costumes and SM gear in one corner of the room. Then soon after I heard a girl moaning from somewhere out of sight. He told me that most people stay on this level to drink, but of course, anything was allowed. He and I talked. Despite having come fully intending to sleep with him, I was interested in getting to know him a little bit beforehand. His English was quite good so I joked with him, Are you educated or something?

He kinda laughed. You could say that. I work with many American companies, so I always have to use English. I didn't ask anything else. He asked me about why I could speak some Japanese and I told him I studied in university and that yes I am still a student. I told him I studied at Waseda for a bit and he said he graduated from there, graduate school, his undergraduate degree was from Todai. Okay, I guess he is quite well-educated.

After the drink and a bit of chatting, he took me downstairs to show me the play rooms. They were comfortable looking but empty. It was still early. I was kinda sticky from running around in the sun all day, so I took a shower and by his suggestion put on a costume. I picked the high school girl sailor uniform. We continued to drink as more customers filled the club.

To be honest, I was quite impressed by him. He has done a lot of independent travel starting at a young age. He has done all sorts of drugs and is inspired by LSD, he told me about taking acid and sitting on the Yamanote line for hours, about smoking marijuana at the beach and and how the sound of waves makes him feel. He traveled and stayed in Africa as a college student, he has spent a lot of time in Eastern Europe, he has been everywhere! He studied physics at university and is a little obsessed with it. He has been going to sex clubs for ten years.

We watched quite a few people have sex but did not enter the rooms. Sooner or later though, after I drank a bit more, we did. Lots of people were watching us. I could see some of the voyeurs masturbating but it didn't bother me. It was hot, I had a good time. We went out and showered, then watched a few more couples. One girl whose arms were tied up was a total masochist, she kept telling her partner in Japanese to forgive her. We watched the end of their session before going in again. Now I wore handcuffs and a blind fold.

The second time was really exciting actually, not being able to see who was touching me, though I am pretty sure it was only him. I felt another hand at one point touching my legs and tickling my feet, but with handcuffs on, I could not do much, I just let things happen, it felt nice! I enjoyed hearing the sound of the handcuffs when my hands tried to move.

Yesterday I went to the Imperial Palace with Lisa. There was not much to see there, but it was a nice visit.

It was her last night in Tokyo so I bought a bottle of umeshuu for us to drink at my place then we went out to Kabukicho to take pictures and have fun. We visited the old club I used to work at and got some free drinks. Afterward we went to another bar where the bartender gave me the change from some guy's 5000 yen bill (he bought Lisa and I two shots). I pocketed the change, a little more than 3000 yen, and we escaped quickly to the station!

We went to Roppongi and drank a little bit more at a few different bars. We both got a little bit too drunk... I threw up everything I had eaten that day, but felt a whole lot better afterwards. We visited crossover, where Daisuke the cute bartender from Osaka works... he was wearing a yukata and I found out he was 29. I finally was more forward with him (probably due to my drunkenness) and told him that we should hang out sometime. He sounded like he wanted to... but he is leaving to visit Osaka this week. We'll see what happens.

Lisa and I went to shisha bar toward the end of the night where we met some guys from the University of Tokyo... Lisa was not so interested in them, so she left early, but I ended up spending time with one guy named Yusuke... we went to a love hotel in Shinjuku early in the morning.

He was a graduate student and I thought he was pretty good looking. He wants to hang out again, but the next couple weeks are going to be busy. My weekdays will still be full of school and work, Saturday, my brother is coming to Tokyo, so I have to spend time with him. Then, Sunday I will leave Tokyo to go to Shonan on a week-long retreat with my class...

I will miss about a week of work, then about 4 days off for Obon... I plan to visit my friend Ai in Osaka during that time... if it works out.

IMG_0724

I can’t help it!
There is no meaning to your name,
those characters simply make sound.
When your body is pressed against my own,
I can’t move, in this alley, brick wall behind me, it’s rainy.
There is something terribly wrong with this picture,
I ignore your face in the mirror,
see that girl and the man with her,
you and I can’t deny,
their looks as they pass by.
Yes, I’m shy.
There is no meaning, I told you!
When I stare, I see through you!
Transparent,
I can’t help it!
I feel nothing real,
skin frozen numb,
I prevent suffering.
Rain drips from your fingertips,
I look away, close my lips.
You are just another meaningless waste of time.
Your hands still on my hips,
I’m motionless, my heart skips,
how far will you go?
His hand slowly slips
into my skirt,
he unzips.

23:37 June 28, 2009

---

Worked in Kabukicho last night and made some cash. I did not sleep and went to Azabu Juban in the morning to meet a new random person named Tomomitsu. I ate soba (again) with him and had a yummy soy mango smoothie. Later in the day, my room mate left to live in Chiba, then I met Zero, again in the evening for coffee. He is kind.

soy mango

I do not know what will happen this week and I do not care (besides the Buck-Tick live on Wednesday!). I need to sleep.

Which countries have you visited? Which countries are on your list to visit?

I've visited several countries in my brief life, but I'd really like to visit more!! Some places listed here I have visited multiple times, some for short visits and others for extended stays, in order of first visit:

1. Iraq
2. Jordan
3. United Arab Emirates
   
4. Palestine/Israel (kind of, I got kicked out)
   
5. Syria
6. Lebanon
7. The Netherlands
8. Belgium
   
9. France
10. England
11. Japan
12. South Korea

I know it's strange but I have never visited Canada or Mexico, the two countries bordering the United States. One day though! I have been to airports in Germany, Austria, Ireland, and Sri Lanka, but those don't really count.

I'd love to be able to visit every place in the world, but nations on the top of my want-to-visit list are:

1. Vietnam
2. The Philippines
3. Malaysia
   
4. Indonesia
5. Thailand
6. China
   
7. Russia
8. Romania
9. Ukraine
10. Bulgaria
11. Turkey
12. Croatia
13. Iran
14. Afghanistan
    
15. Italy
16. All of northern Africa, from Morocco to Egypt
17. Colombia
18. Brasil
19. Bolivia
20. Jamaica
21. Cuba
    

Hopefully I will visit these places before I finish university. I plan to apply for a scholarship that is available to honors and grad students at UW which awards multiple winners 20,000 dollars to spend on a year of pure travel, no studying, but they must have a purpose for wanting to visit the certain nations they plan to spend the money on outside a desire to visit nations of their particular family background and first world nations. Since I have already visited my family's homeland multiple times (Iraq), I have many other places I'd like to visit. Most of the places I want to visit have some political history of particular interest to me, so I will try to talk about those interests in my essay. Who knows, maybe I have a shot?

Today I watched a documentary film named Shinjuku Boys about onnabe hosts in Shinjuku. It was made in 1996 and it was quite interesting. The opening scene shows one of the female hosts wrapping up her breasts, flattening them to prevent visibility. It reminded me of Shiki, the first host I met in Kabukicho when I worked there last summer. When we randomly met on the streets of Shinjuku, early morning after finishing work, she took my hand, put it on her breast, and told me that she was a woman, I could feel the tight wrapping beneath. I am not sure how I can explain how I felt at that moment, not disgusted, not shocked, just melancholy, she had this look in her eyes that was screaming at me, and I felt in a trance. It was bizarre, not bad but actually quite beautiful. I felt the same way today when I watched the onnabe hosts in Shinjuku boys talk about their personal lives and work. Thirteen years after its production, I wonder how these Shinjuku boys are doing today. Recommended to anyone interested in mizu shobai as much as I am!

After watching the film at the library, I went to a peace protest on campus where I ran into my Iranian friend who I haven't seen in 7 months. We have been trying to meet up but as this is the first week of class, we have both been busy. It's nice though because she attends UW now too. Protest was nice to be a part of, but I had to leave early because of class.

Tomorrow is Friday, I only have one hour of class. I am meeting Ai, my conversation partner, in the morning, and then after class I will be free at last! I am finally going to go raving! I can be Rolex again! I can pretend to be someone else and take drugs! I haven't gotten high in 10 days and with the political climate, I've gotten a little depressed. Ecstasy should do the trick. I am going with Gadget, I wrote about her last spring in posts about raves. She's my rave friend, but I think she is sexually attracted to me. A few weeks ago we had an awkward conversation when she asked me about the first night she took ecstasy.

"Hey, you remember the first time I took E?"
Yes
"Oh well I have a question about that, I am not sure about, I want to clear up."
Sure yeah?
"Ok well I don't really know if this happened but... did we make out? I have memories of it happening but I am not sure."
....No girl I don't think so.
"Really? Okay I believe you, it was my first time on E so I don't really remember."

I believe I posted about my fear that she might be a little to attached to me earlier in here somewhere, so it was quite awkward when she brought this to my attention. Anyway, she's a sweet girl and I am happy to get to see her.

Today was so fucking hot in Tokyo... 91 degrees and humid, god.

And my friend wanted to go to Ueno park, in the scorching heat. Fuck!

We met up with his friend for lunch in Shinjuku, then we went to Ueno by Yamanote line (my first time on JR). I seriously didn't want to go, it was so fucking hot, and I am never awake at that time of daylight anyway... the sun was so painful for me. I did it for him though. We walked around the park and went to a museum (which had a really cool Kanji calligraphy exhibition, I was actually really into it, plus it was air conditioned). We went to the boat pond and rented a boat for a little while. All fun and games.

We went back to Roppongi and had dinner with my room mate. Then we went back to Shinjuku, he left to Niigata... and I went straight to Kabukicho.

It was pretty slow to begin, just me and Lea. Then Mari shows up all drunk (I actually think she was on some uppers because she was really talkative, and acting weird, she talked more tonight than I've ever heard her speak before, complaining about her family).

I was thinking it was gonna a shitty night, Sunday... but I had a wonderful customer come in. He was younger too, relatively, he said he was 30, but he looked younger. He looked just right.

I don't know what made me start crying but we were just talking about everything... mostly about my work... he asked me about how much I make in a night, and he just felt bad for me. I felt bad for me too! I started crying... but he was so comforting... I was cold and I wore his coat, and he seemed to want to take care of me... as if he were responsible for my pitiful situation. I honestly don't think he was lying or acting or trying to take advantage of me... I don't know...

He bought me three bottles of champagne, for just us two, no one to split the profit with... I got a little drunk. We must have sat together for 3-4 hours... exchanged phone numbers... made out a little bit... I don't know.

Regardless of whether he was real or not, he gave me a little hope in men, and a bunch of drink back money, if anything.

I have been pretty stressed out for the past couple days. I gave back the phone I was using to the person who gave it to me in the first place because he was bugging me and I didn't want to work at his club. Today I got a new phone after stressing so much about being disconnected from my customers.

I went to work in Shinjuku and it started off as a slow night. I spent my time putting all my numbers in my new phone and messaging Coca Cola-san. Oh guess what? Selena-baby is pregnant! It's so funny because I totally called it... a week ago. She was complaining about abdominal pain and I said she must be pregnant, she laughed it off. A couple days ago she complained that her breasts were paining her and again I told her she was pregnant. And today, the truth comes out! Coincidentally, it was her birthday too!!

We had some interesting customers. A group of five French men came in but they were being cheap, then left. Then a cute Japanese dude came in and bought 1 bottle wine and 3 champagne. It was funny having to switch out all of Selena's drinks for ginger ale.

At the end of the night, the boys surprised Selena with a birthday cake, and we popped open a bunch of champagne, took Polaroid pictures, and ate a bunch of food. We even got the lazy Japanese girls to dance with us, even though they had been sleeping all night. Really fun! I will put up some pictures later.

After everyone left, I was waiting for my pay... The owner's friend wasn't going to pay me, I was pissed... He said he'd pay me tomorrow. Whatever... after that, he lectured me forever about doing drugs in Japan blah blah blah... Then tells me if I ever need anything, to let him know. Suddenly he produces a bag of coke. I was surprised and shocked. He had been kinda flirty with me when we were celebrating Selena... but I didn't think it was anything out of the ordinary. Now he was offering to take cocaine with me and wanted to go to a hotel so that we could "sleep and relax afterwards."

Ha! Yeah right.

I can't believe I denied him. I just couldn't do it though. It was so tempting, my brain was drooling... but I knew he wanted to have sex or something. Nothing is free, cocaine is expensive around here too. So I said no, I have to meet Coca Cola today anyway, and I didn't wanna be coming down from coke nor sleep all day.

But I can't believe I passed up a bag of cocaine like that... I've never refused drugs like that before. I did not like the circumstances though. Anyway, it's 08:30... Coca Cola said he was gonna call me at 14:00... so I don't think I can sleep today... sigh.

Also, my brother is coming to Japan next week, shit!

This job got really old, really fast.

Anyway, today I went out to meet someone who had to give me something, and I walked around Roppongi for a bit. I ended up stealing some random shit, I just can't help it, whenever I am at a shop, in a dressing room, I am overcome by the desire to just take things... Which reminds me, I have a confession to make... My second day on the job in Kabukicho, there was an annoying blonde girl who was counting her cash in front of everyone. Another girl, Selena, told her that she shouldn't carry so much money around like that...

Later, when the blonde was entertaining a customer, I stole 10,000 yen from her wallet. Yeah I am bad, but I didn't feel any remorse. She was asking for it, and she pissed me off.

Anyway, this morning, I watched this documentary called The Great Happiness Space, about Osaka's top host club, and its number one host, Issei...

I thought it was pretty well done, and made me think a lot about my own work here. I could relate to and understand a lot of the expressed views, so I enjoyed it... but at the same time it made me depressed and sick... what are we doing, for god's sake. Drinking ridiculous amounts of alcohol, staying up all night, confusing dreams and reality, acting all the time...

I don't know who I am anymore, I can't see things clearly. I could go spend time with my real friends, who are always trying to make plans with me, but I just can't. Why go spend money to drink and eat, when I could work and have a customer take care of it, and come home with money in my pocket? I haven't met a single one of my friends here in Tokyo since I came to town. Just working, working, consuming everything, cigarettes, clothes, food, alcohol, customers' concerns, why why why.

I never spend money on myself. If a customer isn't buying me dinner, I will not spend more than 150 yen on a rice ball for a meal, and a packet of peanut m&ms, if I am up for it. I am being cheap because I need to save my money.

Anyway... fuck this.

The weather was all gross today but I had a very profitable night!!

I only served two customers, but they were both loaded!!

The first was an Australian guy, a bit of a depressive type, who bought me 10 glasses of wine at 3000 yen (30 USD) each. He just talked and talked and talked...and I drank and drank and drank (grape juice). Then I finally got him to buy me a bottle of champagne. Yatta!!

The second guy was this cute Japanese guy who was with his friend. Luckily, I sat down next the guy who was paying for the night. He turned out to be a Princeton graduate and VP of some big company... He really took a liking to me, bought me 4 glasses of wine, then three bottles of champagne... woot!

I actually liked the second guy, I might meet him today for dinner.......
On second thought, I don't think I actually like him, I get confused sometimes. After writing that I realized it was a lie, but he has money... and he grows weed in his home. He was really interesting... math degree from Princeton, successful company, marijuana grower, speaks English pretty fluently too.

Last night was my night at the Kabukicho club. I had the best customers, and drank a bunch.

The first guy was twenty-something and was upset over some friend problems, but wouldn't tell me. At the beginning, he was all trying to set up a date with me etc, but after drinking a little bit, he started talking about what was really on his mind, his friends. His friends are criticising him for hooking up with foreigners, and chasing hostesses, which I understand, I think some guys can be ridiculous about it. However, his friends made some generalizations about foreigners that made my customer upset, as his girlfriend is a Brasilian hostess. Apparently his friend said that all foreigners come to Japan just to have sex, and we're all whores.

My customer, a big fan of us foreign girls was very bothered by this. He criticised the Japanese for being close-minded and said that 50 or 100 years from now, they will realise their mistakes, and that right now, he knows he is right, he is the winner because he embraces people from around the world. It was all so cute to hear him say. I may have been over-analyzing everything at the time, but I was very interested, since it sort of applied to me.

Second guy was a salaryman who insisted on speaking English with me, even though we probably could have communicated a lot faster in Japanese, since he spoke very slowly in English. lol He bought me 5 glasses of wine at 3000 yen each before I told him he could buy a more cost-effective bottle, and then did so. He wants to take me shopping. I told him Shibuya 109 is having a summer sale, but he said no... Shibuya is for young people, he likes to shop in Ginza. I have no qualms with that!

Anyway here are some photos: